Think of all the ways our lives have been made easier and more efficient with technology.\u00a0 With just the click of a button (or a mouse), we have the world at our fingertips.\u00a0 Communication alone has changed drastically over the past decade (for the better, right?).\u00a0 Besides face-to-face meetings and phone calls, we have email, instant messaging (IM), text messaging, eNewsletters, blogs, list-servs, online forums and threads, virtual reality, webcasts and webinars (and more that I\u2019m not aware of, I\u2019m sure) that enable us to keep in touch.\u00a0 Just a short time ago our primitive ancestors communicated via fax, courier and (gasp!) snail mail.\u00a0 Life really has gotten easier.<\/p>\n
Or has it?<\/p>\n
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While most of us tend to focus on the benefits of the instant communication world we live in, few take into account the downsides of these new modes of communication.\u00a0 Have you or someone you know ever hit the \u201csend\u201d button, only to regret it later?\u00a0 Misinterpreted someone\u2019s email or post because you didn\u2019t fully understand their intentions or the background?\u00a0 Received an email in all caps and wondered why you were being yelled at?<\/p>\n
These are only a few of the new perils of communication we all face in the age of technology.\u00a0 But fear not (or fear less), with some understanding of why these perils exist and what you can do to address them, you may be able to limit the downsides.<\/p>\n
First, studies have shown that a substantial amount of communication is non-verbal.\u00a0 When you communicate through technology, you may be considerably limiting the amount of information you send or receive.\u00a0 Sarcasm, intonation and other nuance fall by the wayside when words are communicated on the screen.<\/p>\n
Take, for example, the following sentence and think for just a moment of all the various ways this message can be interpreted, depending on where the emphasis is placed.<\/p>\n
\u201cI didn\u2019t tell Sarah you were being difficult\u201d<\/p>\n
Did someone else tell Sarah you were being difficult?\u00a0 Did I tell someone else but not Sarah?\u00a0 Did I tell Sarah something, but not that you were being difficult?\u00a0 My guess is that you came up with additional variations.\u00a0 It\u2019s amazing how many ways we can interpret one simple sentence.\u00a0 Imagine the possibilities in a more complex message.<\/p>\n
The next time an email comes across your desk that makes you react emotionally, consider that you may be misinterpreting the message or may not have all the relevant information.\u00a0 Equally important, the next time you send a message, consider that it may be interpreted in multiple ways.\u00a0 The fact that you know how you intend for your message to be received biases you even more to believe that\u2019s the way your message will be read.<\/p>\n
Second, in my work as a negotiation consultant and trainer, I\u2019m made aware only too often of the false assumptions people make in both simple and complex conversations.\u00a0 These false assumptions affect how we look at and react to various circumstances.\u00a0 As human beings, we\u2019re hardwired to make these assumptions, which serve as shortcuts for social interaction; otherwise, we\u2019d have to start from scratch in every scenario.\u00a0 But these assumptions can also get in the way of effective communication.\u00a0 We have to be aware that we\u2019re making them, especially when information and communication are limited, as in email or other electronic modes of communication.\u00a0 It\u2019s important to take some extra time to confirm that your assumptions are correct before responding.\u00a0 Doing so will enable you to move forward with confidence or correct your false assumptions prior to taking an action you\u2019ll later regret.<\/p>\n
Finally, consider the lasting permanence of having your words captured forever in writing.\u00a0 Granted, you might be able to debate whether the message the reader received was what you intended (to my point above), but your words will exist in permanence.\u00a0 In addition, not only can they be misinterpreted by the individual the message was intended for, emails can also be forwarded to a much wider audience.\u00a0 This impact is exacerbated when we respond in public forums.\u00a0 Remember, the words you write are often directly linked to your name, website, social networking page, etc.\u00a0 These words often lay the foundation for your reputation long before you can shape it yourself.<\/p>\n
Given this insight to the dangers of communication through technology, what are we to do?\u00a0 Abandon them?\u00a0 That would be impossible.\u00a0 Instead, consider the following points of advice:<\/p>\n
First and foremost, don\u2019t default to one mode over another, but strategically choose your medium based on the situation.\u00a0 Convening a meeting or relaying numbers and \u201cfacts?\u201d\u00a0 Email may be appropriate.\u00a0 Trying to resolve a dispute or misunderstanding?\u00a0 Increase the level of communication through more interaction \u2013 pick up the phone or request a meeting in person.<\/p>\n
Second, train yourself to pause or even sleep on an emotionally charged email that you\u2019ve written prior to sending.\u00a0 Consider that you may not have all the information or that you may be misinterpreting the message they intended to send.\u00a0 Consider also that what you\u2019ve written may reach a wider audience than intended.\u00a0 When writing, assume you have no control over who sees your words.\u00a0 Once you\u2019ve taken some time between reacting and sending, you may be able to revisit your email or post and alter it accordingly.<\/p>\n
In the face of new tools and technology, we must often reevaluate how we operate to account for the benefits as well as the dangers.\u00a0 Navigating new means of business and social interaction can take time and experience.\u00a0 Fortunately, there are others blazing a path forward for the rest of us.\u00a0 It\u2019s important to learn from them and to recall that these tools at our disposal are relatively new \u2013 like all new tools and inventions, it\u2019ll take us some time to understand all of the long-term implications and to find ways to effectively work within or around them.<\/p>\n